Relationships 101

101
by John Maxwell
– Relationships are the glue that hold teams together
– You will be involved with others in almost every stage & area of life, the question is
how successful will you be in the involvement.
– Relationships begin with respect.
– Find common ground to have relationships.
– You must have trust to continue in a relationship.
– Becoming relational will bring you success both individually and corporally (as a
team).
– Understanding one another is very important in relationships.
– The least important word in relationship is “I” and the most important word is “you”.
– Learn to say “thank you” and “I am sorry”. Learn to ask what their opinion is. Don’t
forget to tell them they did a good job. Try to understand them.
– Different people need encouragement in different ways and the failure to understand
this will be the failure to relate and help people.
– People know everyone wants to be somebody with their life. If you treat people as if
they are important, they will understand that you believe in them and see them as
somebody important.
– Everybody can be somebody when you will simply believe in them and do small
gestures to show that.
– Have faith in people even before they have ever accomplished anything.
– Believe in others:
Believe in them before they succeed.
Emphasize their strengths. Focus on their strengths. Tell them how you
appreciate their strengths both privately and publicly.
List their past successes. Help them remember their past successes, that will
help them have confidence in their own-selves.
1 Relatonships 101 by John Maxwel Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
Instill confidence when they fail. What people fail, they can either give in or go
on. Many are not strong enough to keep going, so you can help them. Tell them
about your own failures and mess-ups, and how you overcame them.
Experience some wins together. Much of winning is motivation.
Vision casting. Cast of vision for others give them hope.
Expect a new level of living.
– Learn to listen:
• Listen shows respect.
• The ears of a leader should ring with the voices of his people.
• Be impressive by listening, don’t try to be impressive by talking.
• Listening well gains you both friends and respect.
• You can learn about people when you will just listen.
• All great learners are great listeners.
• A problem with many leaders is that they will listen less and less as they get
more authority. They forget how to listen.
• A deaf ear is a sign of a closed mind.
• When you quit listening, people will find someone else who will listen to them.
– Commit yourself to confidentiality and respectability. Be trustworthy with the
information when people talk to you.
– You have to love your people and lead them at the same time.
– Put others ahead of your own needs.
– Just about anyone will serve others when they have to, but very few will initiate
serving others.
– Make it your goal to move through the crowd and find people’s wants and needs.
Then go home and make a list of how you can help those people.
2 Relatonships 101 by John Maxwel
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Radicals and Visionaries

thadd
by Thaddeus Wawro
This book was interesting to me because it gave short biographies of men and women
that were successful. With many, the odds against them and their ideas were not
accepted. They did not necessarily have the money or contacts, but they had a dream
and made it happen. I believe this book can be useful applying to starting a church and
team on the mission field. Don’t be afraid to try new things or to launch out believing
something may be a good idea or may work… you’ll never know if you don’t try.
– Pretend that every person you meet in life has a sign around them that says make me
feel important – this will not only help in business, but also in life.
– Sell your products at a reasonable price and your customers will always come back.
– Satisfied customers will always give you more customers.
– One of the true qualities of a good entrepreneur is the ability to see opportunities that
others do not see and take a risk.
– If you go around asking a lot of full of questions and writing them down, you will likely
succeed.
– Spend less time talking about what you do well it more time on improving what you
don’t do as well.
– Give extra courtesy to people and treat your own people well.
– Treat the community right.
– Treat your shareholders right and they will treat you right.
– Aim to do something better than everyone else.
– You fail if you do not try.
– Success is often achieved by those who do not know failure.
– You don’t have to be a visionary, genius or even college graduate to be successful,
you just need to have a dream.
1 Radicals and Visionaries by Taddeus Wawro Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– If you can dream it, you can do it – Walt Disney
– Good taste is good business.
– Most successful people do not accept the status quo.
– Give them quality, that is the best advertisement in all the world
– Learn to bounce back after failure.
– Commit to not giving up.
– Get your start by getting started.
– There is only one boss and that is the customer; you can fire everyone from the
chairman on down – Sam Walton.
– Use technology and keep up-to-date with things.
– A firm, unshakable belief in what they were doing is needed.
– A stubbornness to move forward even when people do not agree or do not
understand.
– You have to struggle in order to get what you are aiming for and many people quit at
time of struggles.
– Don’t measure your success in how much money you make but by how good your
product is.
– Treat your employees right:
• Share your profit with your employees.
• Show sensitivity to your employees needs.
• Let both managers and employees make decisions. Give your employees benefits
they can’t get anywhere else.
• Win the respect and trust from your employees.
– When you see a barrier, you can cry, but get a ladder and climb over it.
– Do not let money, problems, popularity, status quo, or anything else stop you from
your dream.
– You have to believe in success and you have to go after it. It is work, it is a positive
outlook, it is courage and it is a dream. The secret of success lies within.
2 Radicals and Visionaries by Taddeus Wawro Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– Give samples of your product and let people have a taste of it.
– The art of salesmanship is letting the customer have it their way.
– Everyone has talent, it’s just a matter of moving around until you find out what it is.
– Always keep your eye on the operation.
– It is choice, not chance that will determine your testimony.
– If you snooze, you lose. If you have an opportunity, take a chance and put your best
foot forward.
– A product should be needed by many people and should solve a problem.
– No one can be a success unless they love their work.
– Aspire to do something that will make a difference.
– Provide an atmosphere that is good and comfortable for both your employees and
clients.
3 Radicals and Visionaries by Taddeus Wawro

The 4–Hour Work Week

week
by Timothy Ferriss
– Once you decide you’re settling for second-best in life, that is what you will get.
– Do not try to please everybody.
– There’s a big difference when work is more effective and more fun.
– The perfect timing is almost never right, so don’t wait around for it.
– Emphasize your strengths instead of always trying to improve your weaknesses.
– Money alone is not the solution. Many times laziness is the problem, not a lack of
money.
– Don’t avoid criticism, avoid destructive criticism.
– Action doesn’t always bring happiness but there is no happiness without action.
– Conquering fear = defining fear
– Things do not improve on their own
– Luxury has very little to do with money
– The fear we dread the most is usually the exact thing we need to do.
– Your inaction will cost you more than you can imagine. Measure the cost of inaction.
– It’s as easy as believing it can be done.
– If you are insecure, guess what… the rest of the world is too.
– Boredom is the enemy, not failure.
– You become better by failing better.
– Success can be measured in the amount of awkward conversations and situations
you’re willing to put yourself in.
1 Te 4–Hour Work Week by Timoty Ferriss Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– Deal with rejection by persisting.
– Being busy is often an excuse for not doing the few important things you are
supposed to do.
– Effectiveness is doing the things that get you closer to your goals. Efficiency is
performing the task in the most economical manner possible.
– What you do is more important than how you do it.
– Working 9-5 is not the goal, it’s just the structure most people have used.
– Being busy can be a form of laziness.
– The lack of time is actually a lack of priority.
– If you had a heart attach and could only work 2 hours a day, what would you do?
– Decreasing the amount of work is not the goal, the goal is living fuller. Just having
more idle time on your hands will make you go crazy, you have to live fuller.
– Retirees get depressed because of social oppression… and so will you if you do not
live life fuller.
– You have to find something to focus on. You become stressed or board would you do
not have something you can focus on.
– If you cannot define something or act upon it, forget it, there’s no need to worry about
it.
– If you don’t make mistakes, than you’re not working on hard enough problems.
– Time without attention is useless.
– What is the big thing that has been on your list that you have not been able to get to?
Stop and do that first thing in the morning.
– Adversity does not change you, it reveals who you are. Money does the same thing.
– You are never as good as they say you are and you are never as bad as they say you
are.
– No statues are raised to critics.
– A good thing to remember when you were having a meltdown: are you having a
breakdown or a breakthrough?
2 Te 4–Hour Work Week by Timoty Ferriss Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– It is usually better to keep all the resolutions instead of making new ones.
– If you will go 21 days without complaining, it is almost like it resets your brain.
– A not-to-do list is almost more effective than a to-do list. (For example: Do not check
email constantly. Do not check email thread before you go to bed or right when you
get up. Do not ramble with people and get to the point. Etc.) Remember that what you
do not do will determine what you do, so make a list of things to not do.
– Learn to prioritize; you cannot do everything or please everyone.
– Never make the first offer when negotiating, let the other person give a price.
– Identify what excites you and what bores you.
3 Te 4–Hour Work Week by Timoty Ferriss

TED Talks Storytelling

ted
by Akash Karia
– The magic ingredient to making a TED talk is storytelling. Stories allow you to get
your idea across to people without appearing you are lecturing them.
– The opening of the speech is super important. If you do not grab your listeners
attention in the first 30 seconds of your speech, they will tune out. Open your speech
with a story. Introductory remarks such as “hello, my name is, I’m glad to be here”,
etc., are boring. Dive straight into a story – that is one of the greatest techniques of
getting people hooked into your message.
– Stories take people on the mental journey. Stories are hardwired in our brain. Any
audience cannot resist a well told story even if they try.
– A story without a conflict is not a good story. The conflict will make you think or
wonder what is about to happen, put you on the edge of your chair and get you
guessing at where the story is going. If there is no suspense, if everyone knows
where you are going with the story, it is not a good story. When you arouse your
audience’s emotions, they will have no choice but to be totally hooked in your story.
– Use personal stories. Do not just tell a story that you have heard, share a story of a
personal experience that happened to you. If it is something that really happened to
you, you will not have to practice or fake certain gestures, because they will be
natural to you since it is your story.
– Engaging an audience is more than just giving information, it is creating a mental
image in their mind. People remember how you looked and how you said it and they
will likely be changed by it. Sharing a story is much more than simply telling, it is
showing. Sharing information with your audience creates a mental picture of how the
characters in your story look.
– There are five senses that we use to connect with the world. By using more senses
in your story, it is more memorable.
Use the five senses and your speech:
V – visual. They visualize what you are saying. Are you giving details so they can see
it?
A – auditory. What you can hear.
1 TED Talks Strytling by Akash Karia Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
K – kinesthetic. Positions and movements. Physically or emotionally.
O – olfactory. Sense of smell… make them feel they can smell it by how descriptive you
are.
G – gustatory. What can they taste from your speech.
As a result of using the senses, your speech will be remembered and embedded in the
minds of your listeners.
– In order to turn your speech into a movie for your listeners, provide as many details
as possible. Give specific details. Non-specific details will not paint a picture in
peoples minds.
– The spark. The spark is the point in the message that gives hope, where the story
changes and inspires. The spark is what caused the person to change and be
inspired to do whatever he/she did.
– There should be characters in your story.
– There should be a conflict in your story.
– There should be a change in the story.
– There should be a Takeaway for the listeners. What is the point of your story? What
do you want the people to remember? Make the key of your story into a short
memorable or catchy phrase.
– No conflict = no curiosity = no interest.
– Leave your audience with and on an emotional high, on a high point of the story.
2 TED Talks Strytling by Akash Karia

Stressaholic

stress
by Heidi Hanna
– To charge a phone, we have to plug it in but to charge our brain, we have to unplug it.
– Stress is addicting – it tells our brain that we need to be on high alert for everything.
We get a rush from stress.
– We cannot avoid stress totally. The stress is not the problem, it is how we react to
stress that is the problem. Stress robs us from our joy and happiness.
– Worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but gets you nowhere.
– Regardless of the fact that whether the problem is real or not, our body reacts the
same to the stress.
– Although stress might not cause life-threatening diseases, it is been proven that they
have accelerated almost every one of the modern day sicknesses – cancer, diabetes,
dementia, etc.
– Stress is both addictive and accumulative.
– Stress builds from the inside out.
– Instead of freaking out about all of the minor details around you that you cannot
control, you must focus on what you can control.
– How we think drastically changes how we feel.
– Our brains are wired to want new information. It is said that every 6.5 minutes a
person checks their phone throughout the day. We sometimes even feel a vibration
and check our phone when it really has not vibrated… but we are so used to checking
it and getting news.
– We have all been tricked by thinking we are too important and need to be very busy
all of the time.
– Many believe that having more of something (money, time, power, etc.) will make
them happier, but studies have proven otherwise.
– Your brain can be your best friend or worse enemy. It can make you stressed or
relaxed.
1 Stessaholic by Heidi Hanna Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– Studies have shown that brain progress decreases by 40% when we try to do multiple
things at the same time. We think we are saving time, but we are actually doing less.
– We never feel like we have enough and are trying to do more. Multitasking kills brain
cells and tricks your brain to think that you’re not doing enough.
– It is estimated that 75–90% of doctors visits are related to stress.
– In the United States, 40 million adults are estimated to suffer with anxiety.
– Stress is neither good nor bad, but our ability to handle stress is very important.
– We should learn to ride the different waves that life sends us instead of trying to resist
them.
– Stress is neither good nor bad but it’s a stimulus for change. The way we adapt is
needed for a sense of harmony.
– If you look back in your life, many of the greatest things in life have happened after
some of the hardest challenges.
– We can only give our best of the overflow of our cup, not when we are empty – so we
must handle stress correctly.
– Taking care of yourself is not selfish – on an airplane you have to put your own mask
on before helping another. And so in life you can only help others when you are
healthier, happier and managing the stress in your life.
1. Rest.
• An overactive mind and overworked body will not get you far.
• We have to train ourselves to rest.
• Quiet your mind and breathe.
• You should build in breaks to your day. Building a 10 minute break for every 50
minutes to stop and think – But however you do it, you need time to recharge so
that you can give your best for the next job or section of time.
• Listen to music or do something that will unplug your mind from the worries and
chores you presently have.
• Nutrition is essential for your brain. Eat often, eat right and eat balanced.
• Hydrate yourself – drink plenty of water.
2 Stessaholic by Heidi Hanna Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
• Move around instead of staying seated – use a headset to talk on the phone so
that you could walk, use a desk that you can stand at, take bathroom breaks
more often, get up to go get some more water, etc.
• Sleep enough and take naps when needed – Sleep is not just about getting rest,
it is about letting your body and mind repair itself and prepare for the next leg of
work and activities.
• Turn off technology every once in a while.
• Get up and move at least every 90 minutes.
2. Repair.
• Doing things to recover. Build a recovery tool box like going on a walk, getting a
massage, gardening or anything that will help you specifically. This will allow you
to get your mind off of things, feel a sense of accomplishment allow you to
recover to continue going.
• Ask other people what they do to recharge their batteries.
• Become more grateful – if you focus on the negative, that is what you will get.
Studies show that grateful people are happier people. Gratitude is something all
of us can incorporate.
• In a study done with different groups of people, those that wrote a thank you
letter and delivered it remained happier; those that wrote in a journal, became
happier as well.
• Ways to practice gratitude: write down three things you are grateful for each day.
Write a thank you note to someone who has helped you. Make a blessing list of
all that you have. Let people around you know that you are grateful for them.
• Play games. Learning to laugh will help you physically, emotionally, mentally and
spiritually.
3. Rebuild.
• Have to train your brain and body to work better than it has in the past.
• When you think of fitness, you think of exercise for the body, but we also need to
keep the mind in shape.
4. Rethink.
• Our mind has the capability of changing the way we think, which changes the
way we feel.
3 Stessaholic by Heidi Hanna Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
• Optimism and positivity – research shows that a positive brain functions much
greater in almost every area.
• Be aware of the situation’s and adapt to them.
5. Redesign.
• Have a few short steps to get you on the track that you need to be on.
• Set boundaries of what, where and when you will do things during the day.
• Be strategic about time and energy so that you can get more done. You do not
have to reply to everything that pops up throughout the day, stay on track.
• Take snack breaks, take walks, set reminders and begin setting things in motion
to redesign how you live life.
• We must be willing to take the time to create healthy habits.
4 Stessaholic by Heidi Hanna

Stopping Stress Before it Stops You

Top_1_
by Kevin Leman
Disclaimer: this book is written for mothers but I have enjoyed several of the author’s
books so I thought I would check it out and see what is applicable for everyone. Since it
seems many people get stressed, I thought there could be some principles applicable
for everyone. So here it is…
– You can minimize stress and use it as a positive tool in your life.
– Stressing out is a preventable disease.
– Stress comes from pressure. Life is a pressure cooker of stress.
– When an accident (or close-to-accident) or situation occurs, our adrenaline is pumped
up and then goes back down. When we are stressed, the same occurs. If we stay
stressed, the adrenaline continues and that continual adrenaline can cause ulcers,
cancer and more.
– Why is it that a society like ours that has almost everything is so stressed? Much is
because we do not want to wait and we want everything now.
– It is your perception of something that turns it into stress. Your job as well as anything
else is not your point of stress, it is your perception of the situation that is your stress.
– Why is it that some people get stressed over a job, their boss or other situations while
other people do not get stressed – it is their perception that makes them stressed.
– If you like to control, you will very likely be stressed more.
1. Children can be one of the biggest points of stress. – Babies cry, fuss and don’t sleep. Then they turned into two-year-olds and climb
around and get into everything… and the cycle only continues.
– If you let your children be in front of your marriage, they will run your life. You
need to make sure that they are not first place in your life.
– All children are natural getters.
1 Stpping Stess Before it Stps You by Kevin Leman Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– You need to let your children stay with someone else and not think you always
have to be with them or right beside them.
– If your child throws a temper tantrum, don’t run to him/her, just walk out or away
from them to let them realize you’re not going to run to the rescue.
– Unattainable goals of trying to be the perfect parent will only make you more
frustrated and stressed.
2. Lack of Time is another point of stress. – Take smaller bites out of life.
– Sometimes you have to say no.
3. Marriage is another point of stress. – Make your wife part of your decisions, that shows you value her.
4. Another big source of stress is money. – We never have enough and we always want more than we have.
– It seems that the easy answer to stress is to just take some pills but that they will
likely never solve the root problem.
– A simple secret to cutting out stress is work on your priorities. You have the
potential to arrange things in a way that can cut out the stress. Seems simple, and
everyone knows this, but if you want to get out of stress work on your priorities.
– It is hard to get people off of their proverbial stress treadmills, they just continue
forward to exhaustion and burnt out. You must change something and do something
different to cut the stress out.
– Quit worrying about stuff and just face it.
– Most of what we worry about does not even happen.
– Do the unpleasant things first and get them over with and then reward yourself by
dealing with the smaller things.
2 Stpping Stess Before it Stps You by Kevin Leman Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush
– Adopt the motto that if money will fix it, then it’s really not a problem. If you can fix the
situation by buying another compressor, fixing a part, etc., than it is a manageable
problem.
– Stress may get you down momentarily, but you do not have to let it keep you there.
– Our body can only take so much. When we put our body under too much stress,
something has to give and something will give.
– You need your own game plan, a way to unplug and de-stress.
– One of the best answers to dealing with stress is being in tune with your Maker.
– Get enough rest – that is not just sleep, it is relaxing or doing something that will
allow you to get away from routine (walking, sitting down, jogging, etc.).
– Develop a hobby.
– Have a group of friends.
– Recognize the things that cause stress in your life and when your body says it is too
much, than back off.
– Avoid packing your day so full that you don’t have time to think.
– Share your feelings – whether to a person, on paper (journal) or in prayer, share your
feelings with someone.
– Watch only a certain amount of news or certain talkshows and programs. You can
only taken so much negative news, so be careful.
– Build stress relievers in your workday. Take a walk at lunch hour, drink a cup of
coffee, try not to take your work home, and learn to wind down before you go home or
when you are with family. Control your job or your job will control you.
3 Stpping Stess Before it Stps You by Kevin Leman

The 7 Habits Signature Series, Habit 1 Be Proactive

7
by Stephen Covey
– To know and not to do is really not to know.
– The results we get in life depends on what we do.
– Habits are powerful and they determine our level of effectiveness or ineffectiveness.
– We must be proactive, then begin with the end goal in mind, and then we must put
first things first.
– If you want significant breakthroughs, you must change your paradigm, how you see
things. If you change how you see things, you would change how you feel and act.
– It’s not what people do to us that hurts us, it is our chosen response that hurts us.
– Learn to be happy with what you have, not with what you will have.
– The normal paradigm is to think that everything around us must change before we
change, but the proactive paradigm is to say I must change and then everything
around me will change.
– When we blame situations and people’s for our problems, we are not being
responsible – “response-able”. We must take responsibility in order to change things.
– If you want to improve any situation, you must improve the one thing that you have
control of, yourself.
– Happiness like unhappiness is a proactive choice.
– If you start thinking that the problem is out there, you must stop yourself because your
thought is the problem.
– We are responsible for our own effectiveness and happiness.
– Knowing that we are responsible (response-able) is key to our effectiveness.
1 Te 7 Habits Signature Series, Habit 1 Be Proactve by Stphen Covey